What’s the secret to manifesting your dreams?
Here’s a clue: it almost never happens in the ways we think it will. Contrary to what we think, we actually get in our own way when we get attached to ‘how’ it’s going to happen.
The answer? We need to get rid of the hows and just commit to where we want to go. But balancing surrender with intentional action is no easy task, so we’re breaking it down to help get you closer to your dreams and goals, both in business and in life!
Throughout most of our lives, we’re fed messages teaching us that we need to learn from other people how to live our OWN lives. “Clearly that stranger over there knows how I should eat, work, exercise, and live!” we think.
We usually go outside of ourselves for answers.
Today, we’re talking about how to retrain ourselves to first go inward and seek answers within instead of outsourcing our power or wisdom to other people, institutions, or cultural beliefs.
A huge part of that comes back to self-care and making a daily practice out of putting yourself first.
The truth is, putting yourself first–whether it be journaling, going to a yoga class, or even paying yourself first–does not take AWAY from your business. It ADDS to your business by fostering growth, enjoyment, sustainability, and being able to think more clearly and strategically.
When you reframe your self-care to being an essential part of your life and business, everything shifts! When you start feeling, being, and doing the things that matter to you, then you’re well on your way to manifesting your dreams.
My guest today is Danika Brysha, the founder and CEO of Model Meals (a healthy meal delivery business), a self-care coach, the creator of The Brunch Series wellness events and 2018 US tour, and an IMG Curve Model.
All of her businesses are Danika’s way of giving back after her own personal transformation. For most of her life Danika suffered with an eating disorder that led her to some extremely dark places of self-hatred and destructive habits. After hitting the bottom mentally, emotionally, physically, and financially, Danika healed through a variety of tools, which she now shares with thousands of women all over the country.
Her work will only continue to help empower more and more women know that they, too, can live a life of their dreams!
What you’ll learn in this episode:
- Why it’s actually selfish NOT to practice self-care!
- Danika’s self-care checklist and how to use microtasks and teeny everyday habits that support your identity (rather than focusing on results and feeling guilt and shame for not achieving or doing)
- How to know when your spiritual connection and intuition is blocked, and what to do to change your inner dialogue and manifest the career and life of your dreams
- How to give yourself permission to truly follow what feels good
- The importance of profit vs. revenue and paying yourself
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And finally, don’t forget to subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts to get automatic updates. My goal for this podcast is to inspire those who seek flexibility and freedom in their lives by making something happen with holistic, soulful, step-by-step strategies from me and other experts.
Links + Resources Mentioned in this Episode:
- Women Food and God by Geneen Roth
- The Whole30
- Model Meals
- Gretchin Rubin’s Abstainers and Moderators
- Do Less by Kate Northrup
- Profit First by Mike Michalowicz
- A Return to Love by Marianne Williamson
- The Fire Starter Sessions by Danielle LaPorte
- Learn more about Danika Brysha here and follow her on Instagram @DanikaBrysha
- Ready to start a blog but not sure what you should blog about? Take this quiz: What Kind of Blog Should you Start?
- If you want to lend your voice to create positive change in the beauty industry and make money in the process, then becoming a Beautycounter consultant is for you!
- Follow me on Instagram @katekordsmeier and @rootandrevel
More Ways to Enjoy Success with Soul
- Don’t forget to join our free Success With Soul Facebook community for follow-up conversations about the podcast episodes and where I also often go live to answer your burning questions. Hangout with like-minded bloggers and heart-centered online business owners exchanging priceless feedback, encouragement, and other golden insights from the trenches.
Kate Kordsmeier 0:00
Welcome, welcome welcome. This is episode six of the Success with Soul podcast and I'm your host Kate Kordsmeier OMG y'all. I am so stinking excited to share this interview with you with my dear friend, Danika Brysha it was one of my favorite conversations that I've had so far for this podcast. And Danika is just such a radiant breath of fresh air I she has so many incredible tips for you guys. This girl knows her stuff. Danika is the founder and CEO of the multimillion dollar company model meals a healthy meal delivery business. She's a self care coach, a whole 30 coach, the creator of the brunch series wellness events and 2018 US tour. She is an incredible plus size model although I feel crazy to even call her that and all of dannic has been His or her way of just giving back after her own personal transformation. So danika spent most of her life suffering with an eating disorder, it led to some extremely dark places of self hatred and destructive habits. But she was able to come out of that and heal those destructive habits through a variety of tools that she's going to be sharing with us in the interview, and that she already shares with thousands of women all over the country. We're talking all about how it's actually selfish not to practice self care. Danika, sharing her self care checklist and how you can use micro tasks and teeny everyday habits that support your identity. Rather than focusing on results and then feeling guilt and shame for not achieving or doing. We are also talking about how to know when your spiritual connection and intuition is blocked and what you can do to change your inner dialogue and manifest the career and life of your dreams. Danika is sharing how you can give yourself permission to truly follow what feels good. And then we talked about the importance of profit versus revenue and paying yourself. There are so many golden tidbits in this interview, I'm so excited to share it with you.
You're listening to the success with soul podcast with Kate Kordsmeier ex journalist turned CEO of a multi six figure blog and online business. But it wasn't that long ago that Kate was a struggling entrepreneur who lacked confidence, clarity, and let's be honest money. But all those failures, experiments and lessons learned helped Kate create a thriving business that impacts thousands and brings freedom, flexibility and fulfillment to her life. If you're ready to do the same and make something happen with holistic, soulful, step by step strategies from Kaden, other experts, you're in the right place. Here's your host Writer, educator mom recovering perfectionist, bookworm and sushi connoisseur Kate Kordsmeier.
Danika, thank you so much for being here. I'm so excited. Me too.
Danika Brysha 3:12
Thank you for having me, Kate.
Kate Kordsmeier 3:13
Yeah. So Danika and I met for the first time at our mastermind retreat, which was like the most beautiful few days ever. But I feel like I kind of knew you I at least knew of you before because I'm such a fan girl of Amy Porterfield. And she's always talking about model meals, which is your company. So tell us a little bit about model meals. And especially I'm interested, I know that your story kind of starts with an eating disorder that you had and how that took you into this thriving business owner, where you have this super successful food company. Thank you.
Danika Brysha 3:55
I'm like laughing in my head with the words thriving and successful because of any business. business owner. No, it's like, yes, you can have a big business and your business can grow. But it has, there's so much there. It's just there so much so. But yes, it is. It's a big business we have, and I'll back up to the story in a second. But we have about 30 employees and been around about five years. It's grown really beautifully. And so the reason it kind of all started, I spent most of my life dieting and struggling with my body and just always been the bigger girl. So I think for me, I got messaging, probably mostly from the media, but really our culture in general that that wasn't okay. And I kind of cultivated my passion when I was young. And my passion at the time was weight loss. It was like that was like what I lived for. And so I spent a lot of years just doing every diet, and eventually that led me into Bolivia and I just realized, Oh, well I can binge eat and grow everything up. And it led me into drug use and alcohol abuse and all these different things. And so that was probably about 1510 to 15 years and eventually after graduating college I moved back to Southern California. And I remember I saw on Oprah a book called Women food and God by Janine Roth, and she was just, it was like the first person I ever heard talking about losing weight without dieting. And my goal was still losing weight. You know, I hadn't kicked that, yes, that not enough ness. But to hear someone talk about it in a way that wasn't like napkins or Weight Watchers or whatever, was really empowering. And it's worth mentioning, I lost and gained and lost weight throughout that whole journey I was on. So I had lost at one point in high school about 40 pounds, and people treated people treating me really differently. And all of a sudden guys like me, and all of a sudden I was, you know, whatever. And it just it really stuck with me because I realized that I was I felt like I had gotten proof that what I believed was true. And that was that I was a more value if I was skinnier. And so that stuck with me and I decided when I was in high school, I decided okay, well, if I could just keep losing weight, maybe I can be a model and a model became like my dream I just like that's all I wanted, which is kind of sad if I look back on it, but that was the goal. But so I decided that that's what I wanted. And that was what really triggered a lot of the eating disorder behaviors. Because I just was like, okay, just 10 more pounds, 10 more pounds, 10 more pounds, and then I'll submit and then all whatever. So after college, I was in LA, I just sort of surrendered after reading this book, women food and God and I thought I'm the only thing that I haven't tried in or not lose weight is not trying to lose weight. And so I just surrendered. And my body kind of settled, I didn't really lose weight, but I also didn't gain weight. And I was like, I realize why I'm putting in all this effort for 15 years, like exhausted by my efforts, and I still like the same results more or less. So anyway, I just kind of found a little bit of surrender my body not like full on self love by any means. But I was getting there. And I was at a bank of america in Los Angeles and I had some modeling agents approached me and asked me if I'd ever thought about doing plus size modeling. And that was a real like, aha, like gods. moment for me because I felt like it was a message from the universe that said, You're perfect exactly as you are in this dream we've wanted for so long can happen in a way that you'd love to hurt yourself. And so I signed with them and all of a sudden, I was modeling for target number 21 and their minerals and like all these big brands, and my career just took off. So I've been working television
Kate Kordsmeier 7:20
so like, I just have to stop you for a second and because obviously people can't see you. Is it that you're considered a plus size model? Yeah, I mean, you guys if you see Danika you would never I mean, I just think that says so much about our diet culture and what we consider and yeah, that That's
Danika Brysha 7:43
so crazy to me. Well, just First of all, in general the fact that they have to have labeling for people's body types and right a special category of clothing. When when the majority of women fall into that category, I wear a size 12 and I'm five foot 10 plus size model and started The size six. So if that gives you an idea for fashion, straight size, which is like your traditional sizing that people might be used to typically it goes zero to 14, models zero to 14 are typically somewhere between the size zero and a size for models for plus size, which typically starts at 12, or 14 and goes up to you know, depends on the brand 28, whatever models for that are typically in the 10 to 14 range, but some brands will use smaller The nice thing I will say, as the industry has completely changed and I've been in it, it's been a really beautiful thing to watch. And there's a lot more opportunities for like the in between the sixes and the eights of our world or the if you're on the other end of it. If you're 20 to 24 there's work there's opportunity, and I think that's a really beautiful thing is there's a demand for different ages, different colors, different types, different sizes, different heights, all of that. So that's been really cool to witness. But for me, and especially when I got into the industry 10 years ago, it was not that was not me. really the case was, you know, yeah certain
Kate Kordsmeier 9:02
away so. But your story is like the the dream of people like, Oh, I'm going to be discovered. That's what happened to
Danika Brysha 9:09
you manifesting and that's a huge part of my my work like that's a huge part of I was committed even though I didn't go about it healthy ways. Every single day I woke up with this clarity this like burning desire to be a model. And so we will manifest what we want, but we won't always do it in the way that we think it's going to happen. And so when I work with clients now and I work I do a lot of work with women around like self care and lifestyle design. When I work with them, what I tell them is like you got to get rid of the house, the house, the thinking we have to know how our dream is going to come to fruition is what gets in our way. It's really just about deciding where you're going and just committing to where you're going and surrendering how you're going to get there. And I always use the GPS example of like when you are going somewhere you haven't been before, all you need to know is the address you type it in. And there's a lot of different routes like Google Maps is going to show you, this one's a little longer. And this one kind of weaves around here and whatever. But you just kind of surrender to how you're going to get there and trust that you're going to get there with one of these ways and it kind of works the same. And so I think that was really the first big experience of a like a manifestation coming to life and be the extreme messaging that I needed to hear the healing messaging that I was okay exactly as I was, like, they wanted me exactly as I was. And so I moved to New York City, and I'd signed with Wilhelmina Models out there, and I was continuing to model a little bit but when I moved to New York, I remember this was in very late 2013 going to 2014. And I moved to I moved to the West Village, and I remember thinking, I had this opportunity to reinvent myself and it was I've been partying a lot in LA I just was sort of not super healthy, whatever, but I decided I wanted to do a sober January and I figured if I was gonna do a sober January I would do something like food challenge whatever, dieting culture, and I did the whole 30 I found the whole 30. And at the end of those 30 days, the whole 30 to this day has been the most powerful change in my life. I had no idea how much changing what I ate and doing it in a dramatic way that truly eliminated something for a length of time long enough to actually show me a result. I had no idea how that could impact my life. It was I always say it's like someone could drain on my brain and it went and like wash out all the fog and I became clear. And through the mental clarity and the energy and the focus and the ability to concentrate that I got through hole 30 and getting sober. Everything else transformed. It led me to the deeper work it led me to meditation it led me to looking at the psychological stuff at the how and not just what I was eating, but how why and what all of these things. Well, I loved it. I loved how I felt I was like I can't I art now I know better, right? We get so used to our normal That we think that we don't realize there's another level for us. And so once I felt that next level, and I knew how I could feel naturally, it was really difficult to go back to eating the things that made me feel just sort of blah, even though I thought I felt good at the time. And then I experienced a different extension. And so I just kept at it, and I stayed sober for that entire year, which living in New York City is an interesting Feat.
And I did whole 30 not the whole year, but I kept that made that my lifestyle, I got to meditation, yoga, all that sort of stuff. And it was like it was a real awakening. For me. It was I mean, my whole life shifted. And I gotten to the Overeaters Anonymous program, which really helped me Look at how I'd why I was eating, I was eating the underlying stuff, not just the food, and I mean, there were times that I was binge eating and I would binge on hold, like I would binge on like apples and almond butter and celery and I would eat like 10,000 calories about in like 20 minutes sitting. So that was very much in my head. But I just was using it. I was just doing it with foods that were quote unquote healthy and so it took me a while to realize that it wasn't about the food. So anyway, I what happened as a result of this sort of new lifestyles, I lost weight, I lost about like 40 pounds, and I lost all my modeling jobs. So I went from making six figures modeling to nothing overnight, there's no like, leave, there's no leader there is just like, I was like the same thing. Like As I was saying, as high as six eight is sort of this no man's land for plus size models or regular models. Like there's not really work you're too big to be the straight size You're too small to be plus. There are clients that use it, but anyway, I went I was I had no income, and I had no financial literacy and wellness. So I had nothing saved. I was just living in the West Village and you know, and had this expensive apartment, so I couldn't pay my rent. I got a job at a juice shop. I was making like, I mean, I feel like at the time, it was like maybe $8 an hour. Maybe that's wrong. Maybe there's a lot more than that. But it feels like It was something like that. And that might not make minimum wage might have been higher, but something around there. I remember thinking, what could I do to make money that that I'd be doing something that I love? And I said, Well, what am I already doing? And I inventory my day. So like every 15 minutes, I wrote out how I was spending my time for one day, and I realized I was cooking, I was answering people's health questions, or the whole 30 questions. I was having friends over for dinner, whatever. And I decided, well, if I could cook these meals that I'm making for myself and give them to people, then maybe I can make some money doing that. And so I did. And I launched put something on Instagram and said, Hey, model meals is born. Does anyone want a healthy chef in New York and Chef I was laughing like chef is a really bold statement for my cooking skills. And I did and I launched my little business, My Kitchen in New York, which is totally legal. And I started delivering meals to people and it just kind of took off took off in the sense of like a very small business. But in terms I really realized that in order to scale and in order to grow grow the business I really had to, like it had to be done in a bigger way. And I was three months later, my rent I had a pink slip on my door. I was struggling deeply with binge eating because eating the right foods now, but I was binge eating. And I just realized I had to change something. So I moved home into my parent's garage in Southern California where I then lived for two years as I got my business off the ground, got myself out of six figures of debt, and just built and built. So we've been self funded since day one, with the exception of more recently, like a couple months to build some bigger price tag technology, but we've grown the business to multi million to you know, pretty well, I think 20,000 meals a month, a month. And we Yeah, and so went from that to finally move out of my parents house meeting. The man of my dreams. We started doing events together. He's a chef. We did women's events around self care and we just hosted them at our house and they kept selling out and selling out selling out. We realized there demand. And so we got an RV and we went on tour and we spent 2018, doing 66 events all over the United States for thousands of women and just helping them connect and get vulnerable and learn tools for self care. I shared a lot of the things that helped me get out of debt, move out of my parent's garage, grow my business to the size in such a short period of time. Where are these manifestation practices, these self care practices, I created something called the self care checklist. And it was like a system for accountability or on the self care practices. And so that was a lot of what I taught. I taught people how to manifest I taught people how to change that when thinking about things, and to like write biographies from your future, all these things. So anyway, we went on tour, came home, and we actually just bought our first house in Las Vegas. So we made the movie last week. So that was a very long winded way of answering your question about model Mills, but I think it probably foundation for some of the other stuff we'll talk about.
Kate Kordsmeier 16:54
Yeah, sure. No, thank you. That was awesome. And I of course I have like a million questions. Just Based on what you just shared, and I think my first one is, like, kind of more about, you got into this more intuitive way of eating, and then you found whole. 30 and I think there's an argument maybe to be made that like, they're the opposite of each other. Right? So how can you and first I guess is model meals whole? 30
Danika Brysha 17:22
Yes. So models 30 paleo, we may expand a little bit but so to talk about the whole 30 The reason I'm said I'm actually hold 30 coach. And the reason that I'm such an advocate for whole 30 is because I don't truly believe that we can eat intuitively if we are not eating real food. And I think that's the issue here right hold 30 actually gifted me food freedom, like it was the thing and it took years it wasn't like I did want to hold 30 and I was free of all my food issues, but is the reason that I have peace around food. And so I am a huge advocate for it built into the program as Whole Foods then the book about food freedom. But it's the whole 30 years, you're not counting anything, you're not looking at calories, you're looking at ingredients, you're not restricting how much you eat. You're not like it's not this obsession for me, it broke down. It really educated me, it gave me like a tangible way to practice eating foods that make me feel good. You know, I like to ride with that structure that really helps me. And so it's really just like, here's a list of foods that you can eat and sell real foods that you can, you know, it's like planting You know, a lot of plant based foods and high quality protein, and here's what not to eat and do that for 30 days, and see how you feel. And so for me, that was freedom because I spent so many years thinking I had to restrict and like not tune into what I wanted and hold 30 actually taught me to tune into what my body was asking for. Sometimes I wanted almond butter, and sometimes I wanted a steak and sometimes you know, and so issue that I have with the intuitive eating conversation is that if I'm eating a bunch of sugar, and a bunch of gluten and things that are getting inflamed My brain that is disconnecting my how my brain and my body speak to each other. How am I supposed to act intuitively? How am I supposed to feel clear? How am I supposed to make informed choices basically listen to my body went bodies numb, my brain is numb, and there's like blocked channels. And so that's a big thing for me is I believe, like my changing what I ate led to an incredibly massive emotional and spiritual awakening for me. And when I am not eating that way, and I'm not nurturing myself care, and I'm not, if I don't take myself care, my spiritual connection is is blocked, I do not have and it's so beautiful to live in that zone of like pure connection with yourself because you know what to say yes and no to and you know, what will serve you? We're so used to going outside of ourselves for answers. And I think that's a big problem is we really need to get back to this. The we need to retrain ourselves to first go inward and we And seek inspiration outside of ourselves that we need to seek answers within. And so I think that that was a big part of what it gifted me is the ability to seek answers within myself. And once I realized that I didn't need someone else to tell me how to live my life, I was just blocking myself previously from listening into the wisdom I already had. Everything changed.
Kate Kordsmeier 20:20
Yeah, I love that. That's a really good point. So I mean, I This interview is not supposed to be all about food, but I'm so interested in this topic as well. So I'll just end with one last question about that is, so do you eat whole 30 now and are you still sober? Or have you found a way to kind of live in the middle?
Danika Brysha 20:39
I found exactly what I'd search for for 20 years, or however many years it was. And that's a balance, like, I eat primarily hold 30 I'd say eat hold 30 ish. 80% of the time. I don't do all the sugar. But I have to learn that lesson over and over and over. So like, I'll go like six months. about it. And then I'll bring it back in thinking with all the little here a little bit. And I can, I'm a little here a little there. And then I have a little here and there every day. And then I have a little here and there at every meal. And then I have a little here and there every meal plus everything in between. So it trickles in. It's like in the recovery program, they say it's cunning and baffling. And that's how it feels for me. And I have to really treat sugar as any alcoholic who treat alcohol or drug addict, we treat drugs, I have to really look at it that way. Because it greatly impacts my life. And it's tricky, because the more healing that I do, the less loud it screams, but it still impacts me. And so it's almost harder to stop doing when something doesn't feel so aggressive. But it's really trickled into my life. And I can look back on a month or six months and realize, wow, everything's changed. So that's my that's sort of the premise. I try and avoid gluten but again, like I have gluten, sometimes I have sugar sometimes and the way that I eat and the food choices that I make, first and foremost come from how I want my brain to function and the spiritual connection that I want to have Like if I need to speak or if I need to really show up at work or do that I need to eat a certain way to be able to do that. If I am on vacation and I'm in Italy, yeah, meat pizza, we're relaxing like I'm not having so so I base I eat based on how I need my brain to function first and foremost, in terms of alcohol, I really don't drink very often it's a like, once or twice a month, for the most part of the last like five or six years I've been sober. So I've probably been sober like four out of these last few years. I don't love it. I don't feel a need to be black and white with it. Because occasionally it's fun. And I have you know, it's like, but it's not a like everyday thing.
Kate Kordsmeier 22:39
Yeah, but I think the beautiful thing that I'm hearing you say here is like it's not that you're doing whole 30 because somebody else told you this is the way to eat. It's that whole 30 allowed you to like open that block in your brain that you had and hear what your body says and now you choose to eat a certain way because you personally haven't issue with sugar, whereas somebody else may not and could just be like, Oh, I have no problem just having sugar a few times a week and I don't even think about Right, exactly. It's all just about tuning into yourself and figuring out how do you want to feel good. And I think that's the thing. That intuitive eating a lot of people struggle with, with balancing nutrition and intuitive eating is that eating intuitively isn't just allowing yourself to eat junk all the time. It's eating what feels good. And sometimes, stopping at McDonald's on a road trip might feel good, right?
Danika Brysha 23:34
Most. We probably know that I feel better when I'm eating certain things and avoiding certain things, but it's its internal that's setting those things and not some external source telling you, this is how you have to eat. Absolutely. And I think for me, the layer of complication on top of that, between like, nutrition and intuitive eating for me is addiction. Like I very much am an addict. In the area of food, and it trickles in and it gets stronger and stronger, and then it overpowers my legs. I mean, I was in debt, I was overdrafting my bank account to get food. You know, I did, she had broke into people's rooms, like dorm rooms in college to steal food, like I did everything that in any addict would do around getting their drug, because I would, I would restrict and I would isolate so that I have it near me because I thought it was an issue of willpower. And so I have to it's a little complicated because a lot of intuitive eating messaging says, you know, no rules, no restrictions, which I agree with, and I approach all of my food. I think the biggest thing is putting the power back into our own hands. And I think that's what hold 30 did for me. It gave me the power to make my own choices like that's a big part of the program. But then you get into the recovery communities and the truth is I have to look at for me sugar and probably flour but really sugar I have to see it as a drug. I have to treat it that way. And I don't believe I'll be covering as a black and white solution. There's so many different options out there. But I've found that when it is not part of my life, and I treat it as a black and white thing, my life is easier. And I really struggle with gray areas to be honest, like, I find that I've stopped trying to make things harder than they need to be, like, you know, that process where we're like, I'm going to test myself to see if I'm strong enough, whatever. And it's like, why, like the great for me a lot of times having a black and white rule or a structure around something. I thrive in that I love it. And so why am I shaming myself saying this is not the way to do it when it feels good in my body? Sometimes the whole 30 feels really good for me. Sometimes it doesn't feel good for me. And I think that's like the general theme here right and can be stretched way beyond food. It's that we are in a culture where we think we have to get the answers outside of ourselves everywhere. And we really need to relearn to tune in, to feel into our bodies to meditate to understand to listen to what we're being told what messaging we're getting, and if something feels good for you, the chances are you should should follow that. And it doesn't really change all the time. I think there's a thought process of like, I have to pick this one way of being. And this is how I have to live my whole life. And this is the way and so I haven't found it yet, right. And it's not the case. It's the cases that we are humans who live in seasonally and who change. And that's how life works. And at one point in my life, something's gonna serve me. And then another point, it's not going to serve me, and everything is going to help me grow. And so I think it's, that's like a really big focus for me. And a lot of the work that I do with women is helping them come back to themselves after being fed messaging for so long that they need to learn from other people how to live their life.
Kate Kordsmeier 26:41
Right? I love that. That's Yeah, so beautiful and so true. And that is true, living intuitively. And yeah, listening to that, because you and I are very different in that sense. Like, you know, Gretchen Rubin and she has these, I'm trying to remember I know that she has the four tendencies. which I love. But then she also has this like you're either a moderator or an abstainer. And it sounds like you're an stainer. You like black and white, all or nothing? No, that's where you feel more comfortable. And I am like, you can't tell me what to do. And
Danika Brysha 27:15
I'm both. I have both. And that's what's that's where it's like this. And so I think it's more like honoring whatever. Yeah, at the time, you know, right. Can you not do any black and white?
Kate Kordsmeier 27:28
Well, so I do struggle with black and white thinking, especially because I think my father is a very black and white thinker. And so I was just raised in this very, like, there is one right way to do things kind of mentality. So I can struggle a bit with it. But when it comes to food, any restriction, like when I've done the whole 30 a few times to I mean, I've tried all different kinds of diets. And really, for me, it hasn't been to lose weight so much as it's been to heal my body from some chronic health conditions and sometimes It's worked really beautifully. And I felt great and I haven't felt restricted or whatever. And then sometimes in my life, I've just been like, I just want to live, I don't want to have to, like, not be able to go out to eat or go to a friend's house and say, Oh, I can eat that and whatever it might be. And so sometimes it really messes with me that it's like, it can be so black and white. And I think you know, of course if you're like doing a whole 30 It is very black and white, but if you're just kind of living your life and having learned from what things made you feel good and bad after a whole 30 I think that's really powerful too. And so yeah, and but you know, my mom she struggles a lot with with overeating and binge eating. She definitely has that kind of binge personality type as well. And so what works for her is like the opposite of what works for me. And I think the whole point is that there is no one size fits all and it's exactly what you said of like, there's not even a one size fits you forever. It change Like you said, so.
Danika Brysha 29:01
And I think, I think at the core of it, it's permission. And this is like one of my favorite words, right now is this word permission. And because I will say for sure when I'm on a hold 30, or I'm doing anything where there feels like rules or structure, I want to rebel. That's my personality. 1,000%. So for me, what's been key in having success with and really any of these things that I do is that I, I change the inner dialogue and have to continually remind myself that I can eat whatever I want, I am choosing because it's like in a second, we give the power away. We're like, no, give it back. We're human beings like we want. We want the power we want to feel in control. And so if we give our power over to this unseen entity, that's like, you know, has like is gonna spank us with a ruler. If we mess up. Then we automatically rebel. So if I do anything that I do that has a structure to it, I have to continually remind myself that I am making a choice because here's my Why I am choosing so even if I'm doing the whole 30 even though there's black and white rules, it'll be, I am choosing to eat this way. Like, I have to just remind myself and say, if you want the sugar, you can have it, you're free to have whatever you want. You're a grown ass woman. But like, and that really, I've found really helps me. And then in other moments, if I'm opening a cabinet, and I'm realizing I'm not hungry, and I'm eating more for emotional needs, sometimes I just give myself permission if it's okay, that's how you're taking care of yourself today. And the second I do that I eat so much less, you know, and yeah, like you just have what you want and and put it away and move on. And so permissions been a big part of this dialogue, and then keeping the just holding on to my power and anything I choose to do.
Kate Kordsmeier 30:46
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Danika Brysha 31:29
Okay, so let's shift gears a little bit.
Kate Kordsmeier 31:33
One thing that also come out of this is like, okay, so you're a model and you have this amazing company model meals and your whole 30 coach and you have this event series. How do you manage it all this is a lot for one person to be doing and have their hands and all these different
Danika Brysha 31:49
pots. Yeah, I'm not one person. We have amazing people and amazing team. There's no that is a myth that like anyone can do that by themselves. So I am Very supported I, in the modeling space, I have agents in the media space, I have talent managers. And for my personal brands, I have a media manager who helps me manages my inbox and helps with different social media like coordination. My model is team, like I said, we have like 2530 people on that team, I have a business partner. So there's a lot of support. It's not possible without it, that's how my business grew is like, every time you're sort of at that place, you're like, ooh, I can barely handle this workload. And you make that risk of hiring someone it feels scary, because it's a lot of money. And then if you hire correctly, that person creates space for you to grow the business, right. And it's just like this, like climbing a staircase over time. And so I have a lot of support, but it is a lot. And I think, you know, in the mastermind You and I are in I think that's why we're drawn to it is so many of us are and women in general are doing too much and our energies in a million different places. And we're so burnt out. And that was something you know, we talked about this at the mastermind And earlier on this, you know, before we hopped on here, I think I realized recently that this lifestyle and I travel like 50% of the time. So in addition to all of this business stuff, I'm on planes, all the time modeling, I'm on the East Coast a lot like all the time. And so what happened was, I think I've been functioning in this state of chronic stress for so many years that it's my normal, like I was saying earlier with my food, right? my normal was just feeling kind of crappy and being gassy and bloated and foggy and not being able to read one page of a book. But remember, you know, like, that was my normal. I know, there was alternative until I tried something dramatic. And so I think that the big piece for me was like, I realized that I was living in a state of chronic stress and craziness. But I had had I had to compensate so much through my self care routines in order to make this lifestyle created manageable for myself. Then now my self care routine was like three, four hours a day and if I was not diligent with my self care, I was not getting this much sleep. And meditating every day eating kind of perfectly and all things my life became unmanageable. And so it finally clicked for me. We talked about this, like it clicked for me that just because I can do it, and just because I can I have the flexibility in the lifestyle that I created for myself to practice a lot of self care doesn't mean it's right. Right, just because it's manageable doesn't mean it's right. So for me, I'm, you know, one of the reasons we moved here to Las Vegas is really, I'm trying to unravel a lot like I just, it's too much, and I'm lowering my expenses. And I just don't want to work so hard. I don't think that's what life's about. And I think it's really easy when you get into that space of, Oh, I can do anything. I want him to do everything, you know, and that's where I got and it's, and it burnt me out like 66 events in 10 months is a lot. Like a nice, yeah, we set them up and we broke them down. And we led them and we cleaned them up. And then we drove vehicles across the country. I mean, and while running the business while hosting virtual groups while modeling like so I learned and I'm glad that I had To learn that way, but I'm really in this state of like, what Kate, Kate's mastermind is doing less, right, like doing less than having more. And I believe that we will have more if we follow what feels good and we nurture, like our needs a little bit better.
Kate Kordsmeier 35:13
Yeah. Because each of these things that you do could be a full time job within themselves. And I know you're saying that you have all this support in these team members. And I want to talk about that too, especially the like hiring when it feels like a risk and not like, Oh, I just have all this extra money, I should just hire some people. But I think there is so much to be said, for the mental energy that is taken up even if you're not the one actually doing some of the work. You still have you like your brain is still involved in all of these different buckets. And, and I know that, yeah, self care helps a lot. But what we talked about was like, Well, if I change my lifestyle, would I need all of this self care or what would that look like so not if you could do it over Again, but more so I guess like, what's sort of your plan for moving forward? Are you trying to simplify? Are you trying to I mean, I know obviously we're in Kate Northrop's mastermind we're trying, we're all trying to do less.
Yeah. So talk about that. Yeah,
Danika Brysha 36:16
no, and it's so relevant for me right now. 1,000% I love what you said about the mental energy piece because that's the thing we don't realize is that just because I'm not responsible for delivering the orders or cooking the food or whatever it is, I hold a lot of space for all the different projects like it takes a chunk of mental energy. And so right now what I'm doing is I'm just really looking at my life and wanting to simplify and, and really taking what I've learned about myself and figure out okay, how do I take what I've learned about myself, which, for me, is the fact that I will never be I will never feel good doing the same thing over and over. I'm not like, I'm not someone who can do the same thing every day. I'm not a day to day operations person. I don't not good at managing people. Not I'm not good. It's just like, I'm not selling is gonna like follow up on you. I'm already on to the next thing. I like creative ideas. I love the idea of coming up with something and taking it from idea into action. And like, there's just so much of that. And so I'm really taking what I've learned and sort of Okay, what do I want this next chapter look like but I found a big piece of this for me is financial mindset, and financial wellness, because what I realized is a lot of the, the, the overworking is rooted in a sort of not enoughness around finances, but I think a lot of it stems from the pain I experienced living in New York when I was when I couldn't pay my rent, and I was in debt or even kind of, in those couple of years after when I lived in my parent's garage. I remember I was modeling for Old Navy and like they flew me to San Francisco and put me in this beautiful hotel, and I went to check into this hotel, and I just like started rebuilding my modeling career but I was living in the garage till I was super in debt. Went to check into the hotel and they had put like a $50 hold on my card to like for incidentals and I didn't have it. Like I literally didn't have $50. And I was like, so panic. I knew it was going to overdraw. I mean, this is Kate, this is like three years ago. This is three or four years ago, long time ago. And it's just like, it's so stressful. So anyway, with the financials, I think what I realized was that I really needed to get honest about my financial situation and look not just at revenue, but profit. I mean, in revenues of the last three or four years, my businesses have brought in, I think over $10 million if you put them all together, but what's the profit, right? Like, let's talk like as business owners, like let's look at profit and not revenue, because I think that we need to like stop having conversations about revenue and like really look at profit, because what am for those who are listening or maybe don't know kind of what that means? Basically, what I mean is, revenue is like all the money that comes into your business, then you have all the different expenses, but you're paying your employees, what does it cost to produce that item like your time, whatever. And at the bottom of that, spreadsheet or p&l is Profit and that's what you walk away with once you cover all your expenses, and for me the last few years has been sure. Like I'm good at bringing in revenue but I'm really good at spending money. And so it's like what's at the end? Why don't have any money at the end when I'm seeing these big numbers come in. And it's because I'm not being intentional, like my expenses are crazy. So for me a big focus first and foremost was like, let's get really honest about all my recurring expenses. I like I cancelled probably two grand a month of recurring expenses that I didn't need and that felt so good and then i less than my living expenses, I thought, okay, I can move somewhere with zero income tax and where I can get a lot more bang for my buck in Southern California. And so there's just like, for me, it's about making financial decisions right now that support the do less lifestyle, right, because I put myself in a space where my expenses I had to make so much money to just pay my bills each month, and I got honest about that number. I was like, What the hell Like, oh my god, this is so stressful. And so yes, I'm a big believer in abundance and we can always make more money. And that's how I've lived my life. I don't feel I think that that it will always flow. It's just energy. But I also think that we need to be loving to ourselves and think about, okay, what really matters. And for me, what I'm really trying to create right now is more time to read more time to do online courses like yours. And like, truly I just, I want I love to grow, I love to share I love to create, and if I spend less, and I get smarter and more intentional with how much money I'm bringing in, I can live that life that matters. And if we have a family one of these days soon, like I can beat have more time. So that's really like my priority is learning. What matters and shaping a lifestyle designed to me is all about designing the life you want and it's always going to change. And through every choice we make. We're going to learn something new about ourselves. So I know I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be. But I am feeling this pivotal moment right now. of Get to shape what this next, you know, this next five years looks like and beyond?
Kate Kordsmeier 41:04
Yeah. And that's like one of the best reasons to be an entrepreneur is because you're in the driver's seat, and you can pivot, and you can change. And yeah, and you're in control. But I think that is such an important point to come back to about the difference in profit. And I just had this funny thing happened to me recently, where we launched the six figure blogger Academy in January, and we had a six figure launch and, you know, it was in gross revenue. And so for Christmas, my brother and his girlfriend gave my husband and I free babysitting, and they're like, every two weeks we'll come and we'll babysit because I was like, it's so expensive to go out and to hire a babysitter. It adds like 100 bucks to your evening, you know, whatever. So they're like, Okay, great. Well, baby said every two weeks I'm like, this is amazing. So then my mom's talking to me. After my January lunch, and she says, Oh my gosh, David was cracking me up, because he's like, yeah, we're babysitting for Kate and Matt on Friday. And I'm doing this because, you know, I want to help her out. She was saying like, money's tight. And, you know, she's needs need some, some time to herself and to have a date night again and not have to spend a fortune. And then I'm on Instagram. And I see she just made six figures in like two weeks.
Danika Brysha 42:30
Kate Kordsmeier 42:30
he wasn't like actually mad about it. But he was just like, she doesn't need free babysitting. And so I had to call them and be like, Look, I know you were joking, but it's not like I got a check for $100,000. And now that's just sitting in my bank account, right? Like, the number that I actually took home me personally is so different from what that gross figure looked like. And you know, he was we laughed about it, but I do think People like they see the gross revenue and they think, oh, you have a million dollars you have you made $10 million, you got 10 million sitting in your bank account is
Danika Brysha 43:07
like you know, it? Yeah. Oh my god, it's so real. And I will say that's been a really hard thing for me in the sense of like, people look at model meals, right? And they think, okay, it's a big business, all these employees, and it's definitely my, like, biggest revenue generator. But in terms of profit for me, like we only we've only paid ourselves for probably about two of the five years we've been in business. I'm the lowest paid employee. And that's not something to brag about, you know, obviously, you know, but what happens, I make my income and other places but here's what happens. I live a certain lifestyle and then it looks to everyone like you are it's just, it's very hard as a business owner, to articulate to people who are not looking at your profit and loss and you're not looking at your spreadsheets and not don't understand the costs of operating a business. Right? Like it's not like I don't want to pay people more. It's not like I don't want to do it. I can't. And the most of us are usually paying ourselves last. So like, in almost every occasion, my employees are making way more than I am. At the end of the day, you know. And so that was what I really realized. I said, This isn't smart. I'm burning myself out just to pay people to pay people. You know what I mean? Like, and at what point? Does this all come to fruition? Right? This like hustle. So I'm really reanalyzing and you know, there's some projects I do that the profit margin is amazing. And I'm really happy to nurture that. And then there's some stuff I do that maybe the prophets aren't amazing, but it feels really good to supply people with jobs they love or to have a company you know, so like, the winds not always money, but the lift and I just read profit first, which I know is a big book that so many people in our community are such advocates for. And I loved it and I wish I read it years ago. I read it last
Kate Kordsmeier 44:57
fall or summer and I'm like oh my gosh, I've been I'm doing this so wrong
Danika Brysha 45:01
for so long. It just breaks my heart and I've had fun on the journey, but it is so stressful. I haven't had a consistent stream of revenue consistent stream of income for, you know, eight years, like not like, where I've gotten, like something that I can live count on or live off of. It's very stressful, and it becomes your normal and that's just, but um, but anyway, looking at profit is a big one, you know, it's like, What? Is this really worth my time? And if I can do less, or do one or two things really well? Then where do I want to focus my energy? So I'm in that sort of like landscaping right now?
Kate Kordsmeier 45:39
Yeah, me too. Me too, for sure. I mean, I've been self employed for 11 years, but this is my fifth year at with this current business that I'm in, and it's the first year that I am paying myself more than my employees that I'm paying myself erst and I mean, I still question it all the time. You know, it And at the time of this recording, we're three months into the year. And it's like, I'm already like, Oh, this is too much I should I should scale back. And yeah, you know, but I'm really trying to just like, No, I'm going to trust this process and try to come at this from this place of abundance. And yeah, so speaking of profit, and I want to talk a little bit about the pros and cons of the different models that you have for the different businesses. So like, what are some of the pros and cons of having a physical product or service like model meals versus some of your live events versus some of your virtual?
Danika Brysha 46:38
Yes, oh my gosh. So from a profit conversation, if we're just looking at dollars, my virtual group so I do a group called New Year at the end of each year beginning so it's more it's like sort of like a personal growth lifestyle design virtual group. That for me is probably my biggest moneymaker because the profit margin is very high. So the reason word there is I can provide an accessible product that people make me any can can access. For the most part, I have payment plans that I keep it really affordable. So $75 or $70, Black Friday, I think an 85 or 85. And I had a payment plan for like four payments of 25 bucks. So I really like I like to have a really accessible offering now that is just like a virtual group. It's sort of like a membership, but not really. And then I have model Mills where the costs to operate that business are very high, but we do big numbers. So there's a margin of scale, but we're at that kind of sweet spot in a business. Like I said, we've been self funded all this time. We're really trying to decide if we're going to take on some capital to grow to the next level or what that looks like because there's just sort of this sweet, messy middle, in a business where you realize okay, that like on paper, you always assume going into business that like you're going to get this place in Doing these big numbers and then that's when all the money starts funneling in. But the bigger you get, there's this sort of like, there's sort of like the beginning where you're operating really lean and money's really flowing. That's like the first couple of years for us. And then this like years, three to five, is where you're in this growth phase where you start hiring the proper amount of people so you're not burnt out anymore whenever and then you realize that your expenses sort of match your revenue and there's no profit. And then I think it's like you get then you learn that and then I think phase three is like, you get the efficiencies and you realize, okay, I have to lower my expenses. I have to be in touch even though there's a lot coming in, like there's a lot going out. So it's interesting, but um, and then not like my tour, we probably walked away with my from our tour with nothing like barely any profit. I was not even like looking at numbers. I was so burnt out. It was like I was trying to like make it through the next day. And I didn't really have a tea. I mean, I learned a lot through doing our tour. But I didn't come back really with anything financially. But what I came up with, but the connections and the in person experience and what that did in terms of building my company. immunity was the when there, right? So all these people that we got to meet in person that I get to connect in real life. So there's a lot of it depends on how you want to value something, right? Like, what is the intention of this thing if it's just for profit financially, when you look at that, right? If it's to build something big and sell it, eventually you have to kind of operate that differently. And that's kind of my sweet spot, which I'm really excited about is sort of, I think I really like the idea of building businesses and eventually selling them and taking them from idea to action, sort of nurturing it and then giving it to the right people to operate. So you know, yeah, it's just interesting. We just kind of have to look at the bottom line. But yes, in terms of dollar signs in profitability, digital virtual products have been significantly better for me. And that's the next business that I'm launching, launching a business with my brother right now. And it's a digital business. So it's basically taking a lot of what I've learned and kind of putting it all together. Yeah. I love that.
Kate Kordsmeier 50:03
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So you also talked in the beginning about manifestation. And I love this idea. And I'm kind of new to a lot of this in the last couple of years. So I'd love to hear from you like speaking on the importance of surrendering and trusting while also balancing that with like, real life actions. I think that's where I struggle a lot is like, well, when are you surrendering but like you also have to actually do things do we talk about The GPS thing on this call, or were we talking about? Yeah, yeah. You said that in the beginning, which I hadn't heard that analogy before. I loved that.
Danika Brysha 52:07
Yeah. Can you tell like my brain right now is like we've talked about that. Yeah. Well, I know you and I talked before the call, and I couldn't remember if we were talking about that before we started recording. But yeah, I mean, it's a it's definitely an interesting dynamic of balancing surrender and intentional action. I will say that the intentional action piece needs to be in the commitment to the end goal. And sticking to it, like something I do. most mornings is I read a biography from my future, like five years in the future, Danica brusha, is that and I feel that in what kind of money am I making? How am I feeling? What kind of work am I doing? And I read that biography and then after that, I read a little This is all part of my self care checklist and my self care routine, which is like the core of kind of anything I teach and myself Like virtual workshops in New Year and all that. And the self care checklist, one of the this element after the future biography is a note from the future like a journal entry for the future. So I write a journal entry as if I'm living that way. This woke up in this house, my kids are running around, whatever, like whatever you want your life to look like, I feel how I feel. And it helps you really embody the feelings of that. And then I try and carry that with me throughout the day. But I really believe that if you just get clear, if you take a few moments to read your goals in the morning, like what are your intentions, and say them out loud, write them down, whatever, I do think that you can then move through the day with surrender. So I think you have to decide this is what I want. Be open to the fact that that might not happen exactly how you want and so a lot of what I do with my clients is I help them not it's not even getting specific on what they want their life to look like but more about how they want to feel and decided okay if your future biography and your journalist you It might just be all about how you feel, I feel so peaceful, I feel so happy and I'm feeling really healthy. And it's just committing to that. And then once a week, so I have a daily self care checklist I do. And then on Sundays, I have a weekly self care checklist, which is more me looking at the week behind and then the week ahead, like I schedule all my workouts, I scheduled my whitespace days where I'm not scheduled, I schedule my recovery meetings, I schedule, all the things that I schedule, my days where I schedule whitespace is what I'm talking about. So it's like days where I don't have anything scheduled so that I can flow. And in that one of the practices i do is i read my goals list my like 2020 goals list every Sunday morning. And it's really great because it just helps me realign with what I want. And so I think it's more about getting really intentional about committing to that goal, or desire or intention, repeatedly and then surrendering how it's going to happen because I believe that if you tell yourself You are a certain kind of person, you tell yourself something is manifesting. You will move through the day and subconsciously make choices that support the shaping of that desire without having to do much. But if you're not remote if you just like write this goal down once and then like, never look at it again or never think about it again, then you can't manifest it. It takes time. Yeah, such good points, your self care checklist, is that something that anybody can get access to? Like on your email list? Or how can we
Kate Kordsmeier 55:24
get that so okay.
Danika Brysha 55:28
It is something I share. It's something I need to work on. I need to put that I've been thinking about doing an online course it's a really digs into that, because I've taught it modalities, but it's specific, it's layered. And it's not just like, yes, you can learn. Let me just give you the basic you guys can start right now. Because I hate to be like, here's the thing, and you have to figure out how to gain access to it. I'm not really sure where you're going to do that. So I teach it in a lot of like virtual groups, and I've definitely written about it and I post about it, but what I would start by doing is start with a five minute or you can Do a five minute daily checklist start with five minutes and pick five one minute tasks that you know really serve you for a lot of myself check those is based in micro habits, which is one minute changes each day. So it's super small so that we are changing from through empowerment instead of overwhelm. The reason that we do all these things and never stick to them is because we overcommit we're not realistic about what we'll have time for. So a lot of the people I work with are moms are super busy are entrepreneurs and they can't commit to these huge routines, right? And so what I found is I started really small, and then my life shifted because of those small routines. And as my life shifted, it shifted more towards the left, I wanted to have more freedom and more freedom, more freedom, and then I could build myself care how I wanted to so now I have all this luxurious spaciousness to do whatever the hell I want. But, but it didn't start that way. So start with five minutes, Bill, put five checkboxes, write five one minute tasks. So what I mean by that is like that you can do in one minute. make my bed. Drink water. Right What I'm grateful for Take my supplements, get dressed for the day, check those off everyday for a week, the next week, add something else six, six minutes, seven minutes. Or if something didn't serve, you pull it and just put something else in. But that's really essentially it. I mean, mine is more complicated, right? Mine has different practices on it. And it has different ways of narrowing down your to do list and all these different components. But it's not complicated. But for me what I realized I was reading all these personal growth books. And I remember thinking, Well, yeah, this is all great. But I think we have a real issue today with this excess of knowledge and without an action plan. And so what's happening is we have all this knowledge and we know all the things that we should do, and we're not doing them. And so we actually end up in more shame and guilt and self like self contempt, because we know better and we're not doing better. And so I felt a big gap was an actual tool for accountability towards all these things. Like if someone's watching if someone's doing your course, Kate, and like if I'm doing this what I would do while I'm watching your course, is actually we'd watch it. And I would absorb, I watched it the first module or something, and I would take notes. And then what I would do is I scheduled time after I'm I scheduled time in my calendar for learning and expansion, lots books, courses, whatever. And then I scheduled integration time after, because for a long time, I was just learning, but I wasn't leaving time for integration. So during that integration, I would look at your I would take what I learned in your course in that module, and I would think, how can I make this into a small tiny thing that I could do each day? Right? And so maybe that was like, you know, working on a blog post for five minutes each day for an entire week. And then every Sunday, I put the blog posts up, you know, so like, I would take that and I put it into a tangible action, and I put it on my calendar, because if for me, if I don't time block something, then it's not going to happen. I only have so many hours in the day, well, if I'm protecting myself care, and I'm protecting my relationships, and my rest of my sleep and all that, so I can look, I color code, like I'm very specific about it. And I would add it to my calendar and I think that's that gap of knowledge about actions. is leaving us feeling crappy?
Kate Kordsmeier 59:01
Yes, that's so true. Because I do think ultimately people are always like, how do you do it? Or what you know what they want you to tell them what to do. But then when you do, they're like, well, I knew that we all know what's gonna make us feel better what we should do, you know, that kind of stuff. But yeah, are you actually making time to do it and I think the micro tasks is such a great way at least to just get started. And even if you stay there for a long time, it's five minutes that you weren't doing before.
Danika Brysha 59:33
So yeah, I love that beautiful. Like not underestimate the impact that that can have, for me, like just doing even if I did 10 squats, instead, I didn't have time to work out but I was like, I'm gonna do one minute of squats. And what that does, it's not about the 10 squats. What it's about is the fact that you just sent a message of your identity you just decided on identity of yourself for the day, and you are sending a message by doing 10 squats in the morning that says I'm a healthy person. with healthy habits, I am fit, I am active. What then happens because you took one minute to do 10 squats is that you go out into the entire day. And you make choices that support that vision of yourself that identity of yourself. So that's what these practices are. It's about choosing what is my identity? What kind of person am I in the world, deciding on that and then surrendering to the fact that if I just decide that's the kind of person I am, I will make choices that support that.
Kate Kordsmeier 1:00:26
Yes, that is so awesome. And I feel like that's so much better than trying to, like achieve a certain result. And better thinking of it more as what kind of person am I am I the kind of I'm the kind of person like you said, I'm healthy, I make time for myself to eat well and to move my body and whatever that might look like to you. And then that's the goal. And when you are thinking like that, I think that's exactly what will happen is that then you do start making choices that live up to that rather than saying I'm going to lose 20 pounds, right and So we did ask some of our listeners if they had any questions about self care, and especially when it comes to running a business. And we got this one great question that I wanted to ask you, which is, he says, I would love to hear any wisdom you have about stepping away from your business without guilt, whether that's over the weekends, or when you're not feeling well, or you just want to take time, like for whitespace. Or for something fun like a hobby, she says that she struggles to actually feel relaxed, even though she's like doing the relaxing activity because of all the guilt.
Danika Brysha 1:01:34
Yeah, so what I would say that I know that feeling deeply and I remember thinking, like, I was scheduling my whitespace day and I had this whole list of like, here's what I can do on that day. And here's what I can't do on that day because I was trying to allow myself to do things that were not work related. But here's the beautiful thing. If your work if you're in a position where you have a business and your work is what you love for the most part, which most likely if you started a business you're doing something you care about Don't feel like you're going to find more joy and other things. That's the truth. For me, my, the greatest joy I have, for the most part is around like growing my mind expanding learning things for my business, that sort of stuff. So I think it's more about allowing yourself space to do the parts of the work that are fun, versus like, because I think that's gonna light you up, like and of course, like, yes, get away from if there's if you have hobbies, or not, don't even like feel productive. But for me, I see everything is productive, right? The second I step away and play, or the second I take, you know, go to yoga, or whatever it is, that is growing my business. And I think what happened, what really helped me is I switched, like things like meditation, right? I switched from looking at that to something that's taking my time and taking me away from work as something productive, that's essential to a higher level of thinking for me. And so it's really, I think, grasping the fact that when you take time off, when you go to yoga, when you take a vacation, what happens is you step away in a way that you're going to be able to think A lot more clearly and strategically about your business, it's going to impact it in a big way. And I think the other piece of it is just like we have to fill our cup as cheesy as it is like, if we don't fill our cup First we have nothing to give. So a lot of the people I work with are moms. And it's this idea of like, of it not being selfish to practice self care. It's actually selfish, selfish to not practice self care. Pay attention to yourself on the times when you've had a crazy week and you haven't worked out and you haven't slept, you haven't do look at how you treat your partner. Look at how you talk to yourself, look at what kind of person you're giving to your children. And understand that practice not making time for that is the most selfish thing that we can do. And so I think it's really for me, it's been shifting that dialogue and that belief system to realize being that those actions of rest rejuvenation are actually the some of the most productive things we can do for our business. So if it helps to look at it as a piece of the business growth that my I think that really helps.
Kate Kordsmeier 1:04:00
Yeah. Couldn't agree more. That's beautiful. Okay, so we're coming up on the end of our time here, but we do have these five questions that we ask everybody. So, you know, it's like the lightning round. Don't overthink it, just first thing that pops into your head. The first one will be easy because it's all about self care. So just pick one but what is your favorite way to make time for self care while running your own business?
Danika Brysha 1:04:26
Do it first thing in the morning. The first thing I do before I look at emails and social media and it has to happen first. Okay, love it.
Kate Kordsmeier 1:04:33
What is one tool or strategy you know, like our mentor Kate Northrup, Charles's, maybe cycle thinking that you use to help you with time management,
Danika Brysha 1:04:43
scheduling everything, like not, that's not just work, meaning that I schedule sleep I schedule every 15 minutes is scheduled and that sounds really overwhelming. But it doesn't mean it doesn't move around all day. And sometimes what's blocked out is whitespace like I was talking about, so what blocked out on my calendar might be a block of six hours of its and I'll just put whitespace in, it just means flow, nothing scheduled, whatever. But if I don't make time for it, it will all the things. So for me, my calendar is my absolute greatest tool like I because it's the it's a visual, it's a real, that's what I actually have time for. And I have to prioritize and I can see what fits in there. And then I can be really honest about a how I'm spending my time if you're scrolling social media for 45 minutes and have to go back and put that on your calendar. When you were supposed to do something else, it doesn't feel good. Or if someone asks you to do something they want like something social. And you know that by doing something social, you're going to have to break a commitment to your kid or your partner or whatever it is. You get to make a decision visually on what where you want to spend your time. So calendar sorry, long winded answer count.
Kate Kordsmeier 1:05:51
Now I love it. What calendar do you use?
Danika Brysha 1:05:53
I use iPads just visually but it's all Google Calendar.
Kate Kordsmeier 1:05:57
Yeah. Okay. What is the Most Powerful business or mindset entrepreneurial book you've ever read, like just the one that you reference again and again and has made the biggest impact in
Danika Brysha 1:06:08
your life. Oh, wow, that's hard. I'm like, it's so hard for me to pick one minor, my favorite, just
Kate Kordsmeier 1:06:15
the most recent one
Danika Brysha 1:06:16
that you've read even when my favorite book is a return to love by Marianne Williamson. And it's not specifically a business book, but it's helped me I think across my whole life, as well as Danielle Laporte has a book called The Firestarter sessions which I sort of prescribed to who anyone who's looking to get a little clear on their passion purpose. Most recently I'm what I'm reading do less I owe profit first. I mean, honestly, I think profit first might be a really powerful because the bottom at the end of the day money is it's about money, right? And so get that right. So let's say profit first for now.
Kate Kordsmeier 1:06:48
Okay, do you have a favorite quote or mantra or affirmation for when things get tough and you feel like giving up
Danika Brysha 1:06:56
I think it would say it would be coming back to myself, but can they do come back to myself for answers? I think what I'm seeking what's usually happening is I'm not aligned with me I've stopped meditating or I've been eating food that's blocking that internal communication system. Or I'm not sleeping or I'm too busy and not allowing alone time. So I think it's like that it's a reminder that my answers are inside of me and just not creating space to listen.
Kate Kordsmeier 1:07:25
Yeah. Beautiful. Okay, the last one is, you know, the podcast is called success with soul. So what does success with soul
Danika Brysha 1:07:35
mean to you? I could access with sole means. Having an abundant successful business and life while without selling your soul for it, you know, like without like, while still having spaciousness, for relationships, for family time for downtime, doing nothing for self care for play. I think that's where we're moving towards. I think we've all been kind of in this burnout and to be honest, not To bring up Coronavirus cuz, I don't know what when you're when this releases, but you know, I think it's a it's a massive opportunity for people to really reevaluate what's important and to rest. And just like everything's closing right now, you know, and I think that we kind of needed it. I know for me, it's like, I hate to say it, but it's a sigh of relief of like, Oh my gosh, I get a break. I know that sounds bad. I know. It's like and I don't mean that to you know, because I feel deeply for people who are you know, and we could have it Who knows, you know, like, but meaning just I think it puts into perspective community, what matters, spaciousness, rest and health and like, how much those things mean. And so at least I'm trying to look at the positive it's an interesting situation but but yeah, I think that that's what matters success with soul is is just living an abundant successful life if success whatever success means to you, but doing it without law honoring your soul. Yeah. Beautiful.
Kate Kordsmeier 1:09:00
No, it's so true and even just on like a lighter note with the Coronavirus stuff. I was at acupuncture this week and MMI acupuncture issues like, you know, like all the soap is sold out. What were people doing before? Like, weren't people washing their hands before? Like, maybe some of this is just look a good reminder. Basic. Yeah, yeah. So that kind of made me laugh, just like yeah, I think, of course, there's a lot of people that are really negatively affected, and it's not to make light of that. But you're right. Some of it is a really nice reminder of what's important. And just getting back to that. And, you know, I think hopefully, it won't be the worst thing if we all have to spend a couple weeks at home with our friends and family. Right and just
Danika Brysha 1:09:50
right, exactly, as long as we're I'm just, I get nervous about all these susceptible community, you know, elderly women like that. So I think we have to as healthy Knock on wood but as healthy people at this stage in our lives we have to be really responsible with ourselves because maybe it's not as life threatening for us but if I carry something I don't know and I get go out that you know so I think that's really like it's like this group responsibility and I think it's can be really unifying. Yeah. You know, something like this So,
Kate Kordsmeier 1:10:22
absolutely. So where can people find you Danica
Danika Brysha 1:10:26
in my house quarantine for
my website DanikaBrysha.com is kind of where like my offerings are but I spend most of my time and most of my stuff is on Instagram. So I'm kind of just like really focused on that platform. It's just at Danica Brysha, maybe, and then model meals is at model meals, modelmeals.com. And yeah, we're not available currently California, Arizona, Nevada. Okay, so I'm sorry. I know one day we'll get there but yes, so we serve those areas and I'm sure you have some great ones in your area too, but um, yeah, and just I'm on Instagram. I'm pretty good with my dm. So if there was any, like follow up questions from this interview and you want to ask something, please reach out and happy to happy to support.
Kate Kordsmeier 1:11:12
Thank you. That's so nice. Thanks for being here.
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